I have to say things had changed. A year back, on the very same day, I had been planning on drinking the entire night and then doing something against the society (which I actually did - I had peed from my balcony). I had fun, I had a blast, I had lived my birthday.
This year it was totally different. I kept looking for ways to cheer myself up but couldn't find any. The birthday bumps did not hurt like they used to, the cake (which I myself bought for my surprise birthday party) had lost its chocolaty self and yes, I was getting birthday gifts. The last part was the most excruciating. Everybody (read: man, boy or simply masculine homo sapien) knows that getting a gift on your birthday only means 2 things:
1) You are a kid who may cry if you don't get a birthday present.
2) You are growing old and you need birthday presents to feel that you are still a part of the society.
The latter held true in my case. As people love to say, I was an OLDIE now. There are no words in the English literature that could describe the anger, the rage, the sadness, the humiliation I was going through. I just wanted to stop aging. Stay 23 for my entire life. I had hoped the same when I had turned 20: I wanted to be a teen my entire life. Our wants never turn into demand for that marketeer up there (please do not "place" anybody in the just mentioned company). What they say is true, there is a huge difference between the real life and the reel life. No Benjamin Buttons in this world of ours.
Happy Birthday Aashish Nag. You just lost 1 more precious year of your life. :(
