So like Shimla

My visits to Shimla, though once in a blue moon, always end up on a learning curve. So the last weekend I was in Shimla , I ended up realizing the subtle characteristics of the place that separates it from the rest of the world, placing it on a higher turf than the rest (no exaggeration). So before I enlighten all you ignorant non shimlites about this awesomely beautiful place, a very important message. The Volvo travel to Shimla & back is highly over-rated. No hot chicks, no sitting comfort, no movies on the TV, no nothing. Haryana roadways gets my vote here.

So, I am in the volvo which has just reached the Shimla Bus Stand. I get down the bus and find myself engulfed by a dozen guys (khan bhais) shouting "Hotel sir Hotel Hotel, Hotel". I tell them that I have a house here. They start again "Taxi sir Taxi Taxi, Taxi". I tell them that my house is a walking distance from the ISBT n there they are again "Coolie sir Coolie Coolie,Coolie". So like SHIMLA. I ignore them and reach home. After a sound sleep of 3 4 hours, I go out to meet my parents who are enjoying the Sun with my neighbors. I am like an even brighter sun, not only to my parents, but to my neighbors also. My neighbor to me "Arey kitna bada ho gaya hai GENU, main Promil didi (my mother) ko keh hi rahi thi ki Genu ke bagair mohalla kitna soona soona lagta hai". This after I spent my entire adolescence fighting with her on behalf of my mother on the very petty reason of Clothes' Hanging space. She goes on to say that I am an inspiration to her children and all other kids in the locality. This compassion, So like SHIMLA.

I reach my new house in New Shimla and spend the entire evening sleeping. The next day I am off shopping. I buy a new pair of shoes. The shop keeper gives a 20% discount just because my dad talked to him in "kangri". (The guy was from Kangra too). Such regionalism & favoritism, So like SHIMLA. I go to the mall next. I love the place. So many memories attached to the place. On the scandal point, I find 3 guys beating the hell out of a poor mal-nutritioned soul. Their shouting makes it very clear that they are from the land of the "khadoos". The police stop the fight. 1 slap on their faces was enough to cool them down. On further negotiation, they confess that the guy they were beating is their Cousin. Such innocent khadus, So like SHIMLA.

When I am on the mall, I have to have the Burger at City Point. I go to the shop and the guy at the counter gives a smile to me. I realize that he is the very same guy who has been working here for the past 3 4 years. He asks " Bhaiya, Veg Burger laga doon?" Before I could say anything, he continues "aapke dost bhi aa rahe honge. kitne lagaun ? 3 ya 4?". I am awe struck. The Social liking, So like SHIMLA. I tell him that I am all alone. I eat my Burger and come back home. 3 days have passed and its time to go back. I reach the Bus Stand, get my luggage loaded and enter the bus. Before I can even reach my seat, I find at least 20 familiar faces staring at me. I greet all of them. Some old school friends, some known acquaintances, some long lost cousins and many hot chicks, who I have seen roaming on the mall. A small world, So like SHIMLA.

The usual happens next. I sit on my seat with no intention of going back. But I can do nothing. My throat is choking, a sinking feeling sets in, there is water in my eyes. This love, this nostalgia, its So like SHIMLA.

The 3 Stages of Intestine/Stomach Infection

Its the same old feeling of disgust. Lying on the bed, shivering even with a blanket on, loss of appetite, fever, weakness, life could not be any more pathetic. The saddest part being that this happens to me every other month. So what is Stomach/Intestine Infection? How does it occur? What are its preventive measure, its symptoms, its cure? Today I am going to enlighten everybody about this deadly trash of an illness.

Stage 1 : The Gourmet
It all starts with the "paapi pet". You are out malling, checking out the hot chicks, making fun of the 'porus' with those hot chicks when suddenly you come across a shop named DOMINOS. The unstoppable urge of diving into the cheese burst is alone enough to take you inside. And when you come out again after an hour, its like returning from heaven. There is nothing better than a double cheese burst dominos pizza. You come back home, miss dinner and sleep.

Stage 2 : Vomiting
The sleep is marred with nightmares. You have no idea what is going on. Suddenly you wake up and realize that it is the uneasy feeling in the stomach that is ruining your night. The condition deteriorates as you go deep into the night. Your misery ends when you are finally forced to go to the toilet to vomit. The first round of puking is hellish. Pain in the chest is intolerable. All you can say is "oo God, please no more!". But this is God's way of having a gala time.. You puke everything you ate the entire day. You start feeling good. The uneasy feeling goes away. You come back and lie down again. The worse is yet to come though. You start shivering. Fever sets in. The entire body is weak, crumbling.

Stage 3 : ORS rehabilitation

You wake up the next day as shit. Your friends are mocking your eating habits, giving tips to get well alongside though. You ask your maid to make 'khichdee' for you, ask your friend to bring ORS packets for you, ask God to forgive you for your sins. The khichdee eating is ruthless, so is drinking ORS every 5 minutes. But that is what you can do.. Your friends go a step further. They order dominos pizza and sheepishly make jokes about you not able to eat. The consequence is that you end up eating 1 slice. Half an hour later, you are feeling good again. No more weakness, no more fever. The only question that comes to mind is "What Happened?"... The valid answer is Dominos... There is this famous proverb "loha lohe ko kaatta hai, zeher zeher ko marta hai". This means dominos hi dominos ko theek karta hai...

The vicious circle goes on.....